Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Photos Don't Lie: Part Deux

I threatened to post some pics awhile back but my insecurities got the best of me.  Now that I am unofficially 12 pounds down I am, actually, even LESS willing to do so.  Why?  Because I feel like I've been working my ass off and don't really look that different.  A few people have commented on how they can see it in my face (thank you friends!) and one of my sweet daughters recently said 'I can tell your boobs are smaller." (really?) but all in all I don't see much of a change.  

But I realized I had to get over my shame real quickly when Hyam had a photographer in the studio a few weeks ago taking pics for her website and an ad in a local publication.  As incredible as she is (check her out here)  - she couldn't hide the fact that I am, well,  still fat.  It was tough to look at - really tough.  Hyam did remind us to look at how strong we are and to be proud of what we're doing - which I am -  but I can't deny that it was nearly impossible to get my eyes to move past the huge ring around my stomach.

So, since the photos are going to be public I thought I'd fess up to the truth now.  Photos don't lie, right?  Below you'll find a few chronological photos from the past few years to the past few months.  There is truly only about 1 photo of me for every 200 we have in our files because 1) I'm always behind the camera and 2) I've not wanted to be in any pictures because of my weight.  I'm trying to let go of the second one, but it's not easy.

July 2008
Despite the obvious I was in major denial about my weight until I saw how awful I looked in this photo.  I was mortifed when we got back from this trip and saw it staring back at me.  How had I not seen this in the mirror?

July 2009
Nothing like standing next to your gorgeous, skinny family to remind you of how fat you are! I lost a few pounds before this trip - knowing I'd have to be with them - but my priorities got out of whack not too long after our return - and so did my weight.

April 2010 
So let me first say that this picture is horrendous and makes me look even worse than I really looked at the time.  I used it here because - how could I not?  I look like a beast.  It's one year later and I've managed to not just gain everything back but to actually exceed my former max capacity.  It was this vacation that finally got me thinking about true change.  (And no, I'm not passed out, just taking a little nap on the beach...with a margarita in my hand...)
May 2010 
I met Hyam shortly after that last beach trip.  About one month later I am 5 pounds down.  I appear very happy about it in this picture - and I am.  I'm feeling good, sleeping and can see changes already.

July 2010
10 pounds down. Though the pounds aren't falling off quite as quickly as I'd like them to I see and feel changes every day.  I'm still big, but a little smaller - and much stronger - than I was just a few months ago.  Interesting how photos can show you not only how far you've come, but also how far you have to go...


  1. Keep plugging along, Amy, you are doing FANTASTIC! And partly due to the inspiration derived from reading your blog, I am finally doing something about my own flabbiness. I'm taking a beginner's level Pilates class once a week. It just about kills me, but I am noticing a positive difference in my posture and my abs are getting stronger.

  2. You look fabulous, Amy! Congratulations on all the hard work. Keep on going! This exercise thing has to get better when it cools off a bit took eh?

    Karen Ransom

  3. Thanks ladies! I love hearing that maybe I've inspired someone else a little bit! Keep up the good work, Karen! Core strength is key to everything and pilates is such a great way to take care of your body!

    And yes, I admit I am crossing my fingers for slightly lower temps soon. The heat is just one more excuse for me...

  4. As an addendem to this...the you can now see the professional pics I eluded to on the back page of The Hook's Annual Manual. If that's not motivation I don't know what is!

  5. I hate seeing pictures of myself, so I understand - but you are beautiful!

  6. I *hate* seeing photos of myself, so I understand how you feel.

    You are beautiful!!!! And you are working on getting healthier and stronger! Just remember that!

    And if you ever want a local blogger to go walking, running, or biking with, holler. I'll meet up with you anywhere!

  7. look at your face... you look great Amy! Im trying to do the same at crossfit though I have fallen off the last week as I have had some unexpected BIG things happen... stick to it! (and Ill try to do the same ;)

  8. Are you really going to keep me in suspense like this? What big things??? I'm dying over here!